Songs I'm Embarassed to Own Volume I: 'Winchester Cathedral'

I love music. I love music more than I could (in all likelihood) ever love a spouse. Sometimes statements like that make me think I love music a little too much.

One problem with loving music so much is that absolute crap slips through the cracks. Where a completely rational person would go "that song is fucking rancid. I think I'm going to listen to something that doesn't make me want to hatemaimrape" I say "hey, I kind of like that."

One of those songs is the following:



Yes, a song about a fucking cathedral sung by a proto hipster through a Rudy Vallie megaphone. 'Winchester Cathedral' was one of the biggest hits of 1966, yet I have no idea why. The sound of young America was Motown and British Invasion, and the old folks were still bumping Elvis and Sinarta. How did this spend time at #1, along with 'You Can't Hurry Love'?

My big theory is that the intro sounds like a commercial for Diet Pepsi, so people had a Pavlovian response to the song. Pepsi was juuuuust starting to take off, so the Pepsi Generation subconsciously took this piece of dreck to platinum status. Or it could be the whistling...

The embarrassing part of all this is while I could skip 'Winchester Cathedral' when it comes on my iPod, I choose not to probably 100% of the time. I have a weakness for stupid Vaudeville songs. Yep, 'I'm Henry VIII I Am' and 'When I'm 64' never get skipped either. I often wonder why I have this proclivity. I guess sometimes it's better NOT to wonder why we like the shit we do. Just whistle a happy tune and think about the bells, like my nephews in the New Vaudeville Band.

Worst Commercial Ever?

Very rarely does my degree in communications come into play. I deal with Point of Sale software, not ad campaigns or PR for chrissakes. Still, I love advertising. I admire a well crafted ad, one that makes you laugh or say, "I wonder why they did that?"

This ad is not one of them.



I mean, who friend requests someone they just went on a date with? What kind of dolt DOESN'T know a date was good? And how was this chick's status update the first person on his news feed?

Overall, the ad just reeks of something written by a twentysomething who has never been on a good first date. A good first date doesn't usually end in an awkward kiss with very little small talk. Plus, the ad now makes me not want to buy a Chevy Cruze or learn anything else about the car. Fail, fail, fail, epic fail.

A Drunkards Visit to Target

Tonight was one of those impromptu drinking nights that were so magical in college and so uncommon in these days of adulthood. Someone said "wanna go out for drinks?" and then Old Chicago was summoned like a Final Fantasy VII spell.

Being the old ass man I am, three beers got me plenty buzzed. Seeing as how this Old Chicago has a Target next door, it felt like the right thing to go blow some cash. Here is what a drunk dude buys at Target:

-1 bag of Pizza Doritos
-1 Quart of Lavender Scented Bleach
-2 Greek yogurts (pineapple and blueberry)
-1 Drake "Thank Me Later" CD
-1 12 Pack of Cherry Diet Dr Pepper
-1 AMP Energy Drink
-1 Box of Peppermint Tic Tacs

Total: 27 dollars. I think the best lesson to be learned here is that you shouldn't go to the absent minded shopping Mecca that is Tar-Zay with a boozed up noggin. Because then you just buy with the impulsive part of your brain.