You Can't Hurry Posts, No You Just Have To Wait. They Say Posts Don't Come Easy, It's A Game Of Give And Take

I will honor the requests of Phil Collins (so that's where you've been for the last ten years, Phil) and post a little. I was supposed to go celebrate Dr. Dre's birthday on Friday, but no cab would pick us up. So I drank a bunch of beers and listened to a rap battle where Nate faded Jeff with a line that concluded "You're Fit Finlay, I'm Lex Luger." Then I ate Burrito Loco, which I want to eff. Jeff put it best when he said "I'm gonna have so many orgasams eating this." Then I worked a bunch. I bought a shitload of discs this weekend. Heres a rundown:

Lucero- Nobody's Darlings
Social Distortion- Prison Bound
Hard Fi- Cash Machine EP
Brakes-Give Blood
Dirtbombs-Dangerous Magical Noise
Oasis-The Masterplan

Everyone knows the general on most of these bands, so I will give the rundown on Brakes and Hard-Fi. Brakes are like a drunk Irish slut. The lead singer sounds sauced and wild, and they do covers of "Jackson" by Johnny and June Cash and "Spmetimes Always" by Jesus and Mary Chain. Oh, they also do a ten second song about Dick Cheney and a minute song about telling some girl to fuck off because he wants to listen to the band. Amazing, shambing folk punk.

Hard-Fi does a pretty good Clash imitation, especially the Clash on "White Man In Hammersmith Palais." "Cash Machine" is a kind of broke Brit follow up to the Streets, and its great, all dubby and kinda punky. The rest of the songs are more of the same. Good for two bucks.

VH-1 plays some crazy shit after 2AM. I just saw the new Nada Surf video for "Always Love." I always see videos for some shit called the Fray or something before I go to bed, with a chick lead singer flying over New York City. That KT Tunstall video is always on. I don't know what to make of this chick. Its not all that shitty, and its weird to hear someone who isn't Pink or Britney on TV. That interview that she gives where she calls her music "Acoustic Folk Punk Girl Stomp" in a Scottish brouge makes me want to shoot 78 year old men with buckshot. And now they are playing "Girl" by Beck. I see this and "E-Pro" every night. Not complaining. Its strange that Viacom is playing videos off an album that, although it was the truth, didn't sell Timberlake or Fiddy numbers.

John Candy eating the "Ol' 96er" in "The Great Outdoors" is on and it makes me want to vomit. I have a soft spot for the Candyman. This film, "Planes, Trains and Automobiles" and "Uncle Buck" make me feel all fuzzy because they remind me of childhood.

Arctic Monkeys comes out tomorrow. I am amped. Goodnight.